Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Top 10 Best Disney Villains

10-Big Foot (A Goofy Movie)

Yes he counts as a villain. One of the funniest scenes in one of the funniest cartoons of all time. Pure genius. “Can you back up a bit Mr. Foot? You’re out of focus.”. The puppet show with the socks, disco dancing to “Staying Alive“, snoring in sync with Goofy, the underwear on the head…Awesome.



9-Wicked Step-Mother (Cinderella)

If nothing else, one scene would merit her presence on this list. That being, the cryptic scene when she realizes that Cinderella was the mysterious beauty at the ball. The way those evil green eyes burned through the revealing darkness permeating her. Pure hate in a glare. Very, very good scene. But that’s not the reason. There is some domestic horror in the intentions of the wicked step-mother. That she would trap her in the tower as she knew her dreams would shatter in a matter of minutes. That she’d rather risk the eternal mediocrity of her family than allow Cinderella a chance to reveal herself. The happiness that would never enter into her heart would be cut off from the lovely dreamer, Cinderella. What a witch. Can you imagine what would have happened if the prince got away, leaving Cinderella in the wake of the wrath of her step-mother. What a terrible thought.



8-Emperor Kuzco (The Emperor’s New Groove)

Now he wasn’t like the main villain in the movie, but his selfishness and unrighteous dominion escalated his character to sub-villain class at least. He was the most ungrateful character I can recall in cartoon history. In the beginning, in the middle, and then in the end before he is almost killed by Isma. Probably the funniest characters on this list. He’s great and get’s an out loud laugh every time I watch him.



7-Shere Khan (The Jungle Book)

One reason he’s on the list. I’m not a big fan of the movie, itself. It has some great characters, such as Baloo, Kah, Bagira, and King Louie (who was also heavily considered for this list), but I find it s dry story that goes too fast. It’s boring. And I think could have been better. Mogley is an idiot and obnoxious. It’s a classic I know, but I can’t watch it more than once every 10 years. However, the enemy to all the jungle, Shir Kahn get’s credit for his control of his empire. EVERYONE in that movie is petrified of him. Even whispering in their closed meetings just so no one can accuse them of conspiring against the tiger. I don’t think I can recall a movie where there is a more feared and dreaded villain than Shir Kahn.



6-Prince John (Robin Hood)

Classic and entertaining. Prince John was hilarious and yet intimidating when he was all riled up. Like in the end when he was ferociously commanding his archers to shot at Robin atop the burning tower “Kill him, KILL him!” Prince John was another great villain who had it all, power, wealth, even the royal crown of England. But it wasn’t enough. VENGEANCE against the purity and standard upheld by Robin Hood. Not to mention the vain hatred of his always getting the upper hand on him and his soldiers.



5-The Black Rat (The Lady and the Tramp)

Of all of the bad scenes in that movie, the attack of the rat was the scariest. When Lady was tied up outside and unable to do anything to defend the infant who took all of the attention and family bliss away from her. Scary, and seemingly deadly. In reality, what would the freaking rat have done? Why would it attack the baby? But still, the glowing yellow eyes lurking through the shadows of the yard, wicked and scary as could be for that stupid movie.



4-Cruella Deville (101 Dalmatians)

Scary...? C’mon, who else would plot to kidnap and skin freaking puppies. And not just one or two…over 100!!! That IS Devilish. What an appropriate name for her. Not only that, she is freaking INSANE. Not just crazy, look at the intensity and ferocity of her expression in the final scenes as she’s trying to run them down in her car. She’s deadly and doesn’t care what it costs for her to get what she wants. Insanely Cruel, and she is scary. I don’t remember being more scared of a cartoon as I was her; well…maybe the evil rat on The Secret of Nimh, but that’s not Disney.



3-Judge Frollo (Hunchback of Notre dame)

A man of power who struggles with arrogance and lust. For anyone who knows me, they know I can relate to this guy. He has a freaking awesome black horse and is ruthless in the beginning slaying Quasimodo’s mother. He doesn’t care who he kills, he’s prejudice against the gypsies. But he will allow anything if he could only quench his “hell fire”. Fantastic villain. A killer, a corrupted rule, a seducer...A great villain.



2-Scar (The Lion King)

Well, first off, ”Be Prepared” was an awesome song in a great movie. He wasn’t the scariest villain by any means, but he defiantly get’s props on one thing. How often does a character plot a murder, execute it, and seemingly get away with it in a Disney film. Off the top of your head, how many deaths do you remember. Not many, and none as meaningful to a story as the death of Mufassa, who by the way was quite a formidable foe. But he did it. Scar, took his land and royal status. unless you think about it. Brilliant and capable.



1-Maleficent (Sleeping Beauty)

Smooth, yet menacing, gracefully yet deadly, cleaver yet devious. She is the epitome of wickedness. Not like most other villains who are corrupted out of a vain deed to be the most loved, or most beautiful, Maleficent planned her vengeance with class to take out the kingdom which despised her. She demonstrated in the end that she could have concurred with brute power (her dragon form) or destroyed the kingdom in her spite (the curse of thorns), but no! She devised a plan to allow King Stephan and his Queen to love and become attached to their perfect daughter, only to await the inevitable curse of her death. The agony of 16 years of the agonizing torture of knowing of their child's inevitable death, was more horrifying than any other form of a physical or political downfall the enemies of Maleficent.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Top Ten words that I'm proud that I can spell everytime.

10-Success
9-Kashyyyk
8-Indianapolis
7-Withdrawal
6-Illumination
5-Alumni
4-Righteous
3-A lot
2-Isaiah
1-Mohonrimoriancomer

Top Ten Words I Can't Spell Right the First Time

10-chiminy - chimney
9-celatrate - celebrate
8-bougey- bogey
7-ok -OK
6-sentance - sentence
5-sence - sense
4-wierd - weird
3-akward -awkward
2-tomarrow - tomorrow
1-htier - their

Top Ten Numbers

10-Thirteen: You know... Lucky 13. And movies like "Friday the 13th", "The 13th warrior", and "Apollo 13".

9-One Hundred and Ten: Because according to your coach "If you give it 110%, you'll most assuredly defeat anyone only giving 100%". How full of crap was he!

8-Five: 5 is always the plot of the best children's songs. "five little ducks", "five little monkeys", and the one about the bugs and the frog. What's that one called? oh well.

7-Three: 3 amigos, 3 musketeers, 3 stooges, Donald Ducks 3 nephews, 3 blind mice, 3 men and a baby, 3rd rock from the sun, '3-po, the 3 parts of the triforce, Etc... Also the best movies are in groups of three. "The Lord of the Rings", "Star Wars" (two separate trilogies), "Spiderman", "X-Men", "The Matrix", and "Superman" (I don't count the 3rd movie as part of the series. It's just a Richard Prior flick).

6-One hundred and one: If you go to the bookstore for a self-help, cooking, or joke book; they all have "101" in the title. "101 dirty jokes containing the word "shag", "101 things to cook with nothing but chicken feet", "101 reasons you aren't as healthy as you were yesterday", "101 ways to annoy your wife before breakfast". All good books if they were real.

5-A Zillion: cause that's the number you use to express a lot of something, though no one actually as a zillion of anything. Morons.

4-Twelve: The best counsels have 12 members. the twelve apostles, the Jedi counsel, the counsel of Krypton, the round table according to "first night", etc...

3-Eight: The number of desired items for many classic games. 8 triforce pieces (Zelda), 8 power crystals (Final Fantasy 4), 8 maidens and 8 crystals (Zelda, a link to the past).

2-Sixty Nine: "...69, he he he!"

1-One: "1" is number one. Where did you go to school?